The Son and the Scapegoat

The Son and the Scapegoat

Immediately the Spirit drove Him into the wilderness. And He was there in the wilderness forty days, tempted by Satan, and was with the wild beasts; and the angels ministered to Him. 

– St. Mark

Normally the evening sky at this time of year was a canvas streaked with brilliant oranges and purples but this day as the sun made its retreat a pale palate of hues for which there aren’t satisfactory words - but that suggested death and decay - lay blotched above the horizon.  The un-colors came along on the Wind that blew from over the valley of Gehenna – the city’s refuse fires were never quenched there, but it seemed more out of control today than usual.  The sickly breeze brought along with it the whiff of whatever was unspeakably burning far out into the otherwise barren and sterile land at the base of Mt. Quaratania just west of Jericho.

Through the opening of the small cave in which he had sought shelter from the sun a few hours ago Yeshua could see the moon – it appeared to be in the wrong place and wrong phase for this time of the month and as he poked his head out of the cave he could see that the space off to the east where the first stars of the evening should have been making their appearance was strangely vacant.

Yeshua was leaning unsteadily against a great stone near the mouth of the cavern, grateful that the accuser was finally gone, although he had whispered as he left that he’d be back at some future opportunity.  The conversations the two had been having were the only sounds Yeshua had heard for weeks besides the Wind that drove him out here a New Moon and a half ago.

Now the silence filled the space around him like a heavy fog, interrupted only by the occasional broken laughter of the jackals or the ululations of the owls.

Selah

Then above his head the silence was cracked by a tap, tap, tap; then a tumble of pebbles raining down from the top of the cave’s doorway.  The face of a raven appeared upside down, peering over the edge, an iridescent black against the backdrop of the last light of the setting sun.

Shlama ahlayku 

Ahlayku Shlama

The raven hopped down into the cave and Yeshua was suddenly certain he was going mad: 38 nights and counting of no sustenance to keep the body alive, no human contact since cousin John baptized him in the river and now the birds were speaking to him.  And he was speaking back. 

“Raven, you are a dark vision in a dark time rapping at my chamber door.  Are you the accuser come back again to torment me?”

“No beloved.  I come in peace.” Said the Raven matter of factly.  “My name is Abad.  Your Father is my Father as well.  I am not certain how my kind came to be a foreboding harbinger of sorrows or evil in the stories of so many - we are dismayed that we are not welcomed as the servants of the most high that we have always been. We do not sow or reap or collect in storehouses yet He feeds us; sometimes he even sent my fathers to feed the prophets of your people as well.  I mean you no harm.  I come with a message.”

“From the Father?”

“Not this time.”

“Then who?”

“I have an associate who wishes to speak with you.”

“Another denizen of the wasteland I suppose?  Is my delirium so complete that speaking to the ravens is not enough, I must converse with the other wild beasts as well?”

“Friend, there was a time, and shall be again when this was not the task of the madman but of all the servants of the most high. In fact it is about these times that my associate BenAzazel seeks an audience with you.”

“Azazel?  You do bring the servants of my enemy back to harass me again.  I have not the strength for this. Please leave me.”

“You misunderstand; the name is an unfortunate millstone about his neck but I assure you he means you no harm either.  He seeks only answers.  Answers he believes you and only you may be able to provide.”

“Where is he?”

“Just over that rise.”

“I cannot travel to him.  I cannot travel at all.”

“With your permission I will bring him to you.”

“So be it.”

And with that Yeshua fell into a deep but fitful slumber.

In the morning as Yeshua attempted to stretch the agony out of his neck from another night with only a stone for a pillow Abad appeared at the cave’s entrance again to ask if he was prepared to entertain company.

“Yes, fine.”

Down into the steep valley came the soft report of carefully chosen hoof steps and disturbed rocks, and then into view stepped the most appalling creature that one’s imagination could ever conjure…

“Go ahead, look upon me, I know I am a ghastly beast.”

BenAzazel was somewhat in the form of a goat but:

His mohair was matted in lumps here and there; while he was covered in bald irritated and scabbed red skin in other places.  He had one horn that stood awkwardly and proudly up but the other that once was curled majestically was now broken and hanging by tangled brambles.  The right eye was permanently glazed a pale blue and the left was unnaturally large and bloodshot and always appeared to be looking at you askance no matter the direction of his head.  He was covered in blisters and sores and tumors and scars and was accompanied by a swarming armada of flies.  He walked with an erratic broken gait that made it look as if he was always headed menacingly toward you.  And oh – the stench.

BenAzazel continued: “Abad came to me at the full moon and told me you were here and that he believes you could be the Anointed.  I told Abad he was a fool to think the Anointed would even pass through the land assigned to Azazel; for this is a cursed region where nothing good can dwell.  Not even the robbers seek refuge in our hollows.  Besides my kind only the unclean birds and a few wild spirits haunt these hills, and then I suppose only on their way to someplace more hospitable.

I reminded Abad that the Anointed clearly belongs in Zion, the city of peace and plenty.  But then Abad asked if I had ever seen Mt. Zion and he advised me that as of late the City had not been living up to its calling of peace.  Furthermore he said the prophets spoke of a time when the Most High will make a new way in the wilderness, streams will flow in the wasteland, forests will grow in the desert, and the wild beasts – even the jackals and owls will honor his Name.

So I and those who followed after me had to come and see for ourselves.”

“There are others like you?”

“Oh yes.  There are many in my line.  We are known by many slanderous names but we are all called BenAzazel. 

I was there when Yehova first gave instructions to Moses and Aaron for the sacrifices to be performed on the Day of Atonement.  I was one of two chosen for the official ceremony that first year; although the stories are told by some that this practice was far more ancient than the writings which prescribed the rite.  For it is said Yehova has always spoken in ways the people would understand in their own time.

My brother and I were chosen and brought to Aaron on behalf of the people.  He cast lots and my brother was elected to the slaughter for the purification of the peoples’ sin.  I felt sorrow for my brother as he was led off to be killed but in secret I thanked the Most High that my life had been spared. 

Soon though I was to learn that to be burdened with a year’s worth of sins for an entire nation and turned over alive to Azazel the desert demon is a far worse fate than to have one's throat slit and end up on the high priest’s plate. At least his blood appeased Yehova’s wrath and his flesh fed the priests – his suffering was over in a moment. 

I on the other hand was saddled with a burden too heavy for even the grave; Aaron placed his hands on me and transferred to my account all the wicked transgressions of the people who followed him around so that their sins would be taken far away.  Then they turned me out into the midbar – the open mouth of Azazel to wander forever in a place apart.  Would that I had been dedicated to the god Mot – at least then my horror would have found an end and I could have eventually found the sweet Shabbat of Sheol and death.  Instead I was cursed to sojourn endlessly in the gerezah – this wilderness where I am ever growing weaker, sicker, more grotesque, angrier, more bitter.  Azazel is a cruel lord; too cruel to ever let the suffering end.”

“You said there are others – where are they?” Yeshua inquired.

“Those called BenBeelzebul dwell in the valley of Gehenna  where the refuse fires burn; for though we all are plagued by these flies that is where their lord lives.  There are some called BenJezabel who keep the distant company of dogs as well as some who have been pledged to others in the accursed council – Marduk, Molech, Asherah and Baal – but they have never been allowed to put us out of our misery for we are all the permanent property of Azazel.  

There is a cruel rumor amongst my kind that if we can ever find our way back to the City gates we could enter into a permanent rest.  But alas we are forever unclean and the best we can hope for is to occasionally be left alone to wander in quiet suffering.  For even to seek the company of our own kind is to merely be insulted and harassed by other foul creatures like me.  

There is no prescribed ritual for our cleansing.  We are forever outside the camp.  The closest any of us has ever come is to be stuck in the valley of Akeldama – the field of blood - without the strength to climb back up.  Some have caught a glimpse of what is rumored among us to be the Temple mount from a far off peak but when they have tried to find their way there they become hopelessly lost in a labyrinth of canyons and valleys and endless wrong turns.”

Yeshua sat up and looked around as if to gain his bearings and try to place himself in the story he was hearing. 

The goat continued: “Long ago I lost count of the years, but I can still remember that first day.  A Levite, a servant of Aaron, a man with a full grown body but the mind of a child was tasked with leading me into the wilderness and setting me free after the priest had done his duty.  The laying on of hands is supposed to be a beautiful gesture of blessing, like a kiss, but that day it was condemnation.  The simple young man was given strict instructions and as he led me outside the camp he spoke kindly to me and even gave me a name.  I remember that I loved the name but I can no longer recall what it was – now I only bear the name of my vulgar lord. 

At first it seemed as if nothing had happened but quickly I learned that I had been damned with a grievous task – to bear the burden of a year’s worth of lies and murders and treachery, of adulteries and swindles, of rebellion and wrath.  For how long?  I cannot know.  Eternity?  So I used to hope for the coming redeemer the people spoke of.  Now I only hope the birds of prey and vultures will find me and someday put an end to my woe.”

As BenAzazel’s voice trailed off a scream broke the morning’s stillness.  A great owl, the color of the canyon walls, swooped down and lit upon the stone Yeshua has been leaning against the day before and began:

“Greetings Son of the Most Favored one.  We have heard the oracles that spoke of your arrival here.  But who am I that the offspring of the blessed Woman should come to me?  Am I not contrary to the Wind that drove you here and that dwells in you?”

Yeshua looked surprised and answered “What are you doing out here in the light of dawn?  Are you not the night creature that comes to tempt men’s flesh?”  

“Indeed. I am called Lilith.  Those to the north say I am a form of their wicked goddess; those to the west that I accompany the maiden of wisdom.  The ancients say I was replaced by The First Mother of your people and cursed to dwell in the empty places, never finding my rest.  So when the tale is told so often in every place and time that every inclination of the thoughts of your heart is only ever evil – well, it became natural to accept this as my fate rather than to war against the expectations of all I encounter.”

A look of recognition came across the face of Yeshua: “The elders in the villages near where I come from speak of you as the woman who comes to the door of their tents at night to lure them into sins of the flesh.  But they refuse to admit that it is merely their own evil desires that allow them to be drawn away.”

“It is true I often have been the consort of these women whose lips drip honey but whose mouths wield a sword that leads to sheol.  For they were the only ones who did not fear me; who did not flee from my presence.  So I became their companion.  I adopted their ways.  

But the men whose desire was aroused at our coming – what they were missing out on was far better.  And I came to understand there should be something far better for me as well.  I had accepted my role in this land but I longed instead to be as my kind were in the land to the west – to be the courtier of the Lady of Wisdom.”

Yeshua’s countenance shifted to a look of welcome and reassurance: “Lilith, lady of the night, here you are in the morning.  Don’t you see you are already free?  You are not opposed to the Wind which drove me here.  In fact - fly on that same Wind.  I have seen you crush a serpents head, this is my task as the offspring of the Woman as well.  Join me.  Be the bearer of knowledge and understanding, of strength and shrewdness.  When men hear your song may they bless the voice of noble women rather than hear a cursed omen.” 

Though he had had no additional food to strengthen his body, Yeshua’s spirit was renewed by the morning’s conversation.  He stepped out of the cavern into the morning and as the sun broke fully over the mountains to the east he saw in every direction beasts coming to gather in his presence.

The next to approach was a large merle-coated dog with bright blue eyes.  He led a pack of a dozen or so dogs of every conceivable color and size and shape.  Behind them trailed several jackals.

“Greetings Rabonni, I am Amit.  My friends and I have traveled from a city just east of here.  I speak on behalf of them and of our cousins the jackals who have not the manners or civility to approach.  My kind have worked for yours for generations guarding the gates and watching over the flocks - yet we still seek a place of dignity at the base of the table where we feel truly welcome rather than scorned.  We have brought you this barley loaf as a token of our intentions.”

A small black floppy-eared dog walked up beside her spokesman meekly and placed the bread next to Yeshua then curtsied and backed away.  

“May it be for you as you have said and your name declares Amit; your faithfulness has made you a friend.  Go in peace” Yeshua replied.

Then a fluttering in the cave behind Yeshua made him turn around to see a family of bats drawing near to the mouth of the cavern.  They spoke to Yeshua as had BenAazel, and Lilith, and Amit and the dogs and were likewise blessed and sent on their way.  

All the rest of that day he spent conversing with beasts who had traveled great distances at the news of his coming: bears, wolves, lions, eagles and vultures, as well as more humble creatures such as locusts all came to hear from Yeshua about their role in his new reign.

All but one.  Tiamat, that ancient dragon, would not come to be redeemed.  He was to remain a distorted chimera for whom there would be no room in a healed land.

As the crowd of beasts thinned and finally seemed to have all returned to their homes, Yeshua's first three visitors made their way back up to him expectantly.  

“Lilith, I have a word of wisdom for you to carry out into the world as you are now a servant of the Most High.  In a very short time I will begin teaching the people all that the Father has sent me to say – including how they are to speak as we are speaking now, directly to Him.  Remind them that the Spirit, the same Spirit which will bear you on its wind, will never lead them into temptation, but shall instead be the one to deliver them from evil.  For the Spirit, in leading me here into this wilderness has led me into every temptation they could face so that the evil could be defeated on their behalf.  They have been delivered into victory.

BenAzazel – you are not the son of Azazel the Satyr, that goat demon.  The Spirit has disclosed to me the name that simple young man gave to you so many years ago.  It was given to him by the Most High himself on that day and this day I return it to you.  From this day forward you are again Lemuel - for you belong to God.”

“Did I not belong to God on that day all those years ago?  Why then did he turn me over to Azazel?  Does God dictate evil and darkness as well as blessing and light?”  

“Lemuel, in this humble appearance there are some things I cannot grasp, some riddles that are not known even to me.  But this I do know, the point of the rite to which you were assigned was never to appease a demon.  The people were supposed to see their sins being borne away into the wilderness they were leaving behind.  They were supposed to leave their sins back there as well.  Unfortunately it came to be one more performance Yehova grew to abhor as the people kept right on putting the guilt for their evil and troubles on one scapegoat after another.  If it wasn’t the actual relative of yours from the ritual it was the Babylonians or the bad weather, the Samaritans or the tax collectors.  Somebody else always being blamed rather than them actually dealing with their faults.

But no more.  I have come to put an end to this system.  I’ll be both you and your brother – the sin offering and the scapegoat.  It’s not Yehova who in the end demanded the blood – that was the people.  As you said yourself, Yehova speaks to people in language and signs they understand.  But I have come to be the last sacrifice.  But not to satiate a bloodthirsty angry god.  Rather I have come to be what those sacrificed animals truly were – the meal of reconciliation between Yehova and man and between man and his brother.”

“Will every beast be safe now?”

“I have come because all creation groans in eager anticipation of its liberation from bondage.  But the message must be delivered by my servants.  So I have one more task for you.  One more burden for you to carry.  But this yoke will be easy and light.  Go and tell all the rest of your kin: all who think of themselves as BenAzazel or belonging to Beelzebul – they are set free.  They belong to Yehova.  And when you have delivered this good news you may return to the City and there enter into your eternal rest.  And then at the last days, at the renewal of all things, there I will see you again.  Go in peace.”

“Peace be upon you! Blessed be your name! Thank you my Lord!”

And as Lemuel walked away his broken gait became sure and steady - and as the dusk hastened he even broke into a trot as he disappeared over the horizon.  

“Abad.”

“Yes my Lord” answered the Raven.

“My time here in this wilderness is drawing to a close.  I have work to do.  Would you like to share with me this barley loaf Amit’s friend brought?”

“I have had no shortage of food as you have.  Please, enjoy it all yourself, you need the strength.”

“Abad, there will be plenty I promise.  There will always be enough.  So it will be my honor to share it with you.  And after we have supped I will spend one more night here to regain my vigor.  Please go ahead of me into Galilee and spread the word around the lake that I am on my way.”